Nick and I have been together and living in a 24/7 relationship for about four and a half years. In that time we have never told a single friend or family member about the alternative lifestyle we live. We have discussed maybe telling choice friends, but never actually do it. Until two weeks ago.
A couple weeks ago I was talking to my new employee (we will call her L) and I casually mentioned that I like to write in a blog. She got super interested and asked me what kind of blog I have. I said one that is NSFW under a pen name and hoped to leave it at that. That was where I made the mistake. L has the ability to get information from people, probably due to her past career of being a private investigator. In the end I ended up telling her that Nick and I are in a Ds relationship.
The response I got from her was better than I could have imagined. She was asking questions, showing real interest in the situation, saying that she has always loved rough sex, and had played that way a bit in the bedroom. She hadn’t heard of someone living that lifestyle the way we did though.
I got lucky. My subordinate who now has a great deal of information that she could potentially use against me was nothing but kind and supportive. This makes me wonder if maybe I am hiding the secret from my friends for no reason. I don’t have any plans of telling my family, but telling my friends may not be that bad. It felt so good to release the secret out into the world. To have it acknowledged by someone who isn’t behind a screen just reading my words.
Next month Nick and I are making a road trip to Portland, OR to see my best friend and her new baby. Maybe by then I can build up enough confidence to tell her the truth about Nick and I. Besides, aren’t people in Portland supposed to be super liberal and open minded? I really just need someone that I can really talk to and not hide this very big part of myself anymore. I want to tell her how happy I am answering to Nick and taking direction from him.
All I know is that the world gets very lonely just Nick and I. As much as I love him and look forward to spending the rest of his life together I want to share our experiences with someone on the outside who actually knows all of the other parts of me.